Please help me get answers, an investigation to what happened to my son at school
- Michael Gove, UK education minister, European Commissioner Maroš Šefčovič
Our younger son was bullied at school, In the beginning they dismissed it as "not serious" but increasingly the bullying got more severe and relentless to the point where his peers wanted him DEAD, that is when he told us, and we informed social services and the school, we also put it in writing, but the school did not take any action.
The bullying came to a head when a week later the children enacted a celebration of our son's death in the class during a music lesson, it was recorded and we got a copy.
Even this serious incidence did not make the school take the bullying seriously. On the contrary: the school decided to designate US as the problem because the parents of the boy who conducted 'the funeral' are both teachers in the school, the mother refused to co operate with the police, and insisted this was a school matter, and will be handled by themselves, during the police call, we were there and heard her justifying what her son did to ours, we were stunned, the police officer was uncomfortable and didn't want us to hear the vicious things she was saying, he tried to stop her but she didn't get the hint, she was nastier than her son.
When she finally reluctantly agreed, she misused her position at the school during the police meeting, she and the school counselor stayed after school hours and USED our son's file to justify her son's actions, we wrote to the head asking him to intervene.
In the counselor's file, after the years she was aware of the bullying, the occasions she was called by other kids to help him, listened with us to the recording of violence and death of our child, she added fabricated information dated after the funeral, she encouraged others to contribute and planned detention to further victimize him.
We had meetings with the head, deputy head and the secretary, who all refused to answer any questions, hand our son's file or co operate in anyway way, they just wanted him out of the school, Parent Partner who attended all the meetings with us, tried to explain during the last meeting what a victim mean, no one in that school saw our 11 year old child as a human being, no one helped him before or after the incident, even though he did ask for help.
The head was concerned just in case any of the children involved felt guilty about what they did to our son, he instructed a person to come and speak to the kids in the class to reassure them that our son was NOT a victim, they did nothing wrong, the school was proud of them, something along these lines, completely dehumanizing R and justifying the actions of the boy who wanted him dead, didn't wait for him to die, carried on with the celebration of his death.
Any wonder R didn't feel safe in the school? he knew his classmates wanted him dead and told us, he heard the recording and asked his class teacher for help, then the counselor, what did they do about it? WHY didn't they help him?????? where was he supposed to go?? CAN the school name ONE adult who at any stage helped him in the 3 weeks between knowing they wanted him dead, listened to the recording and stopped going to school????? he was left to be tormented by the boy who was assured by his teacher father that 'NO ONE CAN EVER TOUCH HIM at the School'.
According to the file, the English/Moral teacher father, who didn't have the decency to respond to the email we sent him after we listened to the recording of his son, was angry that we asked the rest of the parents for help, and in another email, he was disagreeing with a decision made to protect our son, he had NO MERCY, nor was he going to allow anyone to have mercy on a defenseless 11 year old child.
Because the staff ganged up against our son, the officials who were called upon were concerned, they wrote in their report 'our son had to adapt to an environment of hostility and cruelty at the school', they advised us to move him, through no fault of his own, completely disrupting his education, leaving behind everything he has ever known and been familiar with.
The problems did not stop after our son was moved from the school. The head reported defamatory issues and concerns about us to social services, ignoring everything that went on in school, especially as he read many emails from parents who described what our child went through right in front of everyone, the head blamed US for our son situation.
His secretary who I played the recording in her office, she sent out victimizing information about NON existent behavioral problems, labeling and stigmatizing him to his new school, she also decided not to allow us copies of our son's file, it took us 9 months and going to court to get copies of the file, only so we can see what was in them.
From one hand we struggled to get a place at another school for our son who was too scared to go to school, yet the boy who played the piano in the recorded funeral got brilliant references and moved to the most prestigious school in the country.
5 months later, the teacher father and the counselor decided to go after our older son, they sent us a threatening letter, stating that because our older son walked into the IT room not realizing it was booked by the father, as soon as our son was made aware he walked out WITHOUT saying a word, THAT they decided was against school rules and will not be tolerated.
How could an institution, not just any institution, but one that we trusted with our children, have no responsibility or accountability, do not have to answer to anyone, does not investigate, even when illegal offenses are suspected by the staff and their children.
They have complete disregard to child protection rules, data protection rules and every rule in place. is this what a parent should expect from a school? from school staff? how are these people getting through their CRB checks? how are they allowed to carry on working with children in the UK? when is anyone going to do something about it?
Please help us get the school to answer our questions, and take appropriate action.
1) What happened to our son in the school? why no one thought or believed he was a victim? how do they define a Victim? why no one helped him before or after the funeral? how can adults contribute into a child's file? bullies parents? school neighbors? was he safe with these adults around the school?
2) How can the parents of an offender have access into their child's victim's file?
a) Is it illegal for school staff to ‘use’ a child’s file, to defend their own? when their own child openly wanted his victim dead? didn't wait for him to die and carried out his planned funeral?
b) Are there laws about fabricating information on a child’s file? about a child who cannot possibly defend himself? and planning detention based on false allegations they created?
c) Is it legal for a school to allege behavioral problems/outside agencies where there were none? they have access to hundreds of children files?
3) Full acknowledgment of what actually took place, why do they think they have nothing to answer? nothing to explain? we want our son to know he did nothing wrong, he didn't deserve what they did to him.
The Please help me get answers, an investigation to what happened to my son at school petition to Michael Gove, UK education minister, European Commissioner Maroš Šefčovič was written by Parissa21 and is in the category Children's Rights at GoPetition.