Free Parsley from the tyranny of Cilantro

Big Cilantro, the organization responsible to the abuse of Parsley, its counterpart that many consider to be inferior. Have you ever asked yourself why you think Cilantro is better than Parsley? The answer will change your life forever.

What you don't know is that Cilantro and Parsley are twin brothers. The story is a sad one. Long ago, Parsley and Cilantro were tasked with adding freshness to as many meals as possible. Cilantro became greedy and proclaimed itself as the sole garnish. Parsley, the simple and kind one, explained that not all meals were meant to have a garnish while other were destined for the lesser basil or green onions. Angered by the perceived betrayal, Cilantro sought to destroy its brother.

Consumed by its own desires, Cilantro became so corrupt that its flavour began to change. It was at this point that Big Cilantro was born and since then they have received billions in Super PACs in order to silence Parsley.

Crusaders exist.

Does Cilantro taste soapy to you? The same lobbyists that spend billions to disguise the taste of Cilantro are also paying scientists to give you the impression that the soapy taste is due to the fact that a shared group of olfactory-receptor genes, called OR6A2, pick up on the smell of aldehyde chemicals. Aldehyde chemicals are found in both cilantro and soap.

Don't be fooled. That bitter soapy taste is none other than corruption itself. Embrace the realization that you are finally awake and realize just how awful Cilantro is.

For too long Parsley has been forced into the shadows. Sign this petition and help liberate Parsley and end the tyrannical reign of Cilantro!