Unite Mother and Daughter

Be sure to read the bottom part of this petition before signing. PLEASE leave a brief comment and your phone number!

This petition has been created to hopefully prove to my child's Father, and whomever else it may concern, that I am able to be trusted with children. I have created this because in the past month and a half, my daughter has been saying things to me that worry me and I am frankly offended by. On Halloween she cried to me over the phone that she wished to come to my house, I told her she would one day soon, she said "no, Daddy won't let me because your not safe". When I confronted him about this he denied it, and then later admitted he may have said "I don't know if your Mother, or her home, are safe". I'd like to note that he has been invited to my home on many occasions but unfortunately he simply "does not have the time". Last night we were discussing what to do the next day. She expressed that she wanted to go out and I said that I would have to run it by her Dad. I tell her things have to be run by her Dad because she is now 6 years old and is starting to understand whats going on. When she asks to go out, I will not just say 'no" until I have her Dads approval, as that shines badly on me. When we were discussing what we wished to do, she said "Dad wont say yes, he thinks your dangerous" and scrunched up her eyebrows and looked sad as she said it. I may have done things in my past that were far from right, but even then, I would never have put my child in danger. So the fact that he is currently telling these things to my 6 year old daughter disgusts me.

I am not going to get into full details as many of you already know, that and it is just far to much to write. I currently still have supervised access in my mothers home every other weekend. In 2003, when my daughter was 1, I gave up custody to her Father, as I had a drug problem and didn't feel I was fit to parent her. In the same year, I went to rehab and cleaned up (Nov 03). From Dec 03 - Aug. 04, I had my daughter 3 days a week, living at my mothers home, unsupervised. In August 04, I told Ian I wanted to go for joint custody. The very next day, my visits changed from 3 days a week to every other weekend. I took him back to court, but unfortunately with this, and other stresses, began doing poorly again as I began a relationship with an abusive partner. Over the years, I am becoming more and more strong and stable every month. But I would like to note again, that even when I wasn't 'stable', never was I a danger to my child. As I never once came around her intoxicated or with bruises on my face from my partner.

Over the past few years, I have been begging her Father to give me a chance with no luck. In the past year, he has sometimes given me permission to take her out in public unsupervised. But then the next visit, would not. I have asked him to let my Dads side of the family to supervise, as she has not seen that side in a long time, and his response is "she does not know them, I do not know them, I have no reason to trust them, no". When we talk and/or argue about these things he constantly brings up my past mistakes. When we were in court, he would say horrible things to me, and my family told me he was trying to push me down so I gave in, and sometimes it worked, as even though I was growing stronger, I was still venerable.

Also would like to note. It has been ordered by the court that her Father provide me with her school report cards and invitation to school and extra curricular events. I have only seen 1 report card which was last years.

I am not in anyway denying that I am at fault for the mistakes I made when I was 17, nor the mistake of allowing an abusive relationship interfere with my relationship with her, nor am I seeking sympathy. My point is is that her Father is not interested in allowing our daughter to have a good relationship with me, and I, and others feel, it is out of being bitter and controlling. She yearns to come to my home and spend more time with me. He does not seem to care about how this is effecting her, rather focuses on that he is punishing me. He says its because I haven't shown her stability, but he himself changes his mind about outings and how much freedom I have with her, with no cause, as we have not spoken or had contact in between these times, and that also shows her instability, but again.. it shines on me. When I initially gave up custody, it was to avoid her having issues that would disrupt her life, and now, she has to deal with this situation, and it breaks my heart.

One more thing I want to mention that troubles me is the issue of religion. Whenever my daughter comes over her bedtime story of choice is something from her bibles, which she keeps here. We occasionally take her to church, I would send her home with bible study but her Dad would not do it with her. We pray together every visit and she always requests to learn more and discuss Christianity. She tells me it makes her happy. I know her Father is an atheist, but didn't think her Fathers side of the family would interrupt her beliefs until yesterday. She has told me things in the past indicating that her Father expresses to her that he doesn't believe, that's fine, but now she is being directed to not believe herself. She told me that her step mother told her that there is no God during our discussion after reading bible stories. This is just yet another thing that is causing her young mind instability. I don't care if her fathers side does not want to teach her about Christianity, but she believes in God and is Christian, so I don't understand why they cant just leave her be with it, as she has told me herself, it gives her hope and a feeling of peace.